Short Quotes

Never play poker with the world’s fastest animal, because he’s a cheetah.

I’ll do the stupid thing first and then you shy people follow .(Frank Zappa)

All my life I thought air was free, until I bought a bag of chips.

I’m sorry that I’m not updating my Facebook status, my cat ate my mouse.

Fart when someone hugs you, it makes them feel strong.

Why is Monday so far from Friday, and Friday so close to Monday?

How do you go to work? Forced! No, I mean how do you arrive there? Depressed.

I think something’s missing in my life… Like… 2-3 million dollars.

To the guy who created imaginary numbers in Math: I hate you.

How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he’s lost?